Spreading fear and mayhem in the visual arts.

Archive for November, 2004

My Tummybox Feels Broken

by Suzanne G. on November 26th, 2004

David Firth releases
Salad Fingers Episode 5 - "Picnic".

(Salad Fingers 1 | 2 | 3 | 4)

Ceci n'est pas un retour...

by Suzanne G. on November 24th, 2004

Iamque mare invectae flumen populare relinquunt
et Methymnaeae potiuntur litore Lesbi.

(Publius Ovidius Naso, Metamorphoses XI)

  
  
  
© Vladimir Clavijo-Telepnev (via Art Nudes)
(click on thumbnails for detailed view)

"Inside one of the lifeboats, Desdemona was saying, 'Don't look.'
She was lying on her back. There was no goat's-hair blanket between them, so Lefty covered his eyes with his hands, peeking through his fingers. A single pinhole in the tarp leaked moonlight, which slowly filled the lifeboat. Lefty had seen Desdemona undress many times, but usually as no more than a shadow and never in moonlight. She had never curled onto her back like this, lifting her feet to take off her shoes. He watched and, as she pulled down her skirt and lifted her tunic, was struck by how different his sister looked, in moonlight, in a lifeboat. She glowed. She gave off white light. He blinked behind his hands. The moonlight kept rising; it covered his neck, it reached his eyes until he understood: Desdemona was wearing a corset. [...] Brassiere cups pointed up at the canvas roof. Whalebone slats squeezed her waist. The corset's skirt dropped garters attached to nothing because my grandmother owned no stockings. In the lifeboat, the corset absorbed all available moonlight, with the odd result that Desdemona's face, head, and arms disappeared. She looked like Winged Victory, tumbled on her back, being carted off to a conqueror's museum.
All that was missing was the wings."

(Excerpt from "Middlesex" by Jeffrey Eugenides.)

→ Make sure to check out Mr Clavijo-Telepnev's
Alice in Wonderland project, Michelle! :)

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AVANTGARDE

3rd - 5th December 2004

The Nightmare Before Christmas
(curated by Jake & Dinos Chapman)

The incredible line-up includes Throbbing Gristle, Aphex Twin and many, many more...

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ANIMATION

Empire Square 9

Making Fiends 13

God
(by Mr and Mrs Wheatley)

Ouch
(by Tim Greenburg)

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EXTREME FLUFF CORNER


© Pippy

Please also say hello to Mario - the cunning cat that travelled from Milan to north Wales in three days!
Over the Alps.

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CHRISTMAS GIFTS FOR THE WHOLE FAMILY

Absinthe chocolate
Real fluorescing deer
Crab shelters made out of calcium carbonate
Jet-powered wheelchair
(Yes indeed, I was thinking of no-one but you,
Dr. von Seetalstein...)

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DLF TRAFFIC ANNOUNCEMENTS DU MOIS

• "Vorsicht auf der A1 Dortmund Richtung Köln zwischen Burscheid und Kreuz Leverkusen:
Gefahr durch eine Sitzbank auf der Fahrbahn."

• "Vorsicht auf der A46 Hagen Richtung Brilon zwischen Freienohl und Wennemen:
Gefahr durch einen Hund auf der Fahrbahn."

(Both heard on DLF, 11th November 2004, 13:11)

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100% BRAINDAMAGED & DEPRAVED QUOTE

"Panzerlied: We sing this in German. This is a German military song. Hans Schmidt (author of “Panzergrenadier” and “Hitler Boys in America”) told us that he first heard it when he was our age. We laid many tracks over each other so that it sounds like many kids singing as they march down a street."

(Found in an interview with the 12-year-old pro-White folk twins Lynx and Lamb a.k.a. "Prussian Blue")

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PROPAGANDA FOR MY LOVELY WIVES

My gorgeous friend Sadie from New Orleans returns with a new website. Welcome back, Sadie! I'm looking forward to more of your scrumptious shots!

Demonika - a good old DJ friend and clothes designer magnifique from Calgary - is now an official SuicideGirl! W000t!

Meanwhile, elsewhere in Canada, the amazing Kristen is trying to brainwash her evil kitty with nothing but sheer mind-power and Febreeze®. Way to go, girl! ;)

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P. TO THE S.

I'm writing these lines from an iBook that I borrowed for a couple of days. My PC is still infected and I don't have access to my image folders. And this time, not even Strong Bad can help... teh horror!!!!1

Oh, and due to popular demand, I created a new Amazon wishlist that even non-Teutonians can understand.

And now... sick sweet dreams, my dears...

Venit, vidit, destruxit...

by Suzanne G. on November 12th, 2004

Yep, it's a virus.

This time it attacked the network settings and destroyed all communication between my ethernet adapter and router. Hurrah!

Support won't be here until the end of November, so I guess I will die of Offlinitis - slowly, painfully and all alone...

Ah, well, I guess things could always be worse...

Thee Forum ov Psychick Blah, Flickr and my worklog won't be updated during the following weeks.

Please also allow me several days to reply to your emails - I'm not in a position to check my emails daily.

Oh, and please don't spam my ICQ and Yahoo! instant message boxes during my absence - for marriage proposals emotional emergencies please send your text message to 0041 76 400 17 34. Or just listen to the sweet and calming voice of Speegle...

Thank you for your patience. Now have a siamese twin skeleton:


YAAAAY! FUN FOR HOURS!!!1

Are they subtitles?

by Suzanne G. on November 7th, 2004

Today, my friends from near and far, marks not only the 87th anniversary of the glorious Russian October Revolution
(FYI: Russia was working to the old Julian calendar), but also currently Berlin-based Monsieur Klav's birthday!

... and look, even the power stations are dancing for you, sir:


© b3ta

All the best & many happy returns from Helvetistan to Teutonia! ♥

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THE GRUESOME RETURN OF THE TWAT MUNKIE

Everyone loves b3ta's Twat Munkie - above all my dear friend Mer.

However, since a lot of underage kids and happy families are reading this blog, I decided to create a more political and gender correct version of the notorious Singe de la Twat - le voilà:

Oh, and on a similar note, here's Doughboy - shitting a croissant... uhmm...


(Found on Daily Rotten)

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METAPHORICAL VISUALIZATION OF MY MOOD #3


Alison Pebworth - click to enlarge)

Yes, indeed! Another proof that self-surgery is great fun for the whole family!

The lady below even had self-surgical hand amputations.
And look how happy she is today:


(via Dark Victoria)

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RES FLICKRALIA

I added old and dusty new pictures that I found on the attic to my Flickr account.

I can highly recommend the Kunst & Wahn set.

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DIES NATALIS CHRISTI

Due to financial difficulties and a strong inbred penchant for communism and dialectical materialism
I decided to skip this year's x-mas and flee to Cambridge, UK, where I will spend some quiet time with my mum, her partner and my dear brother.

I hereby kindly ask you not to send me any presents whatsoever.

However, if you do feel the sudden urge to buy me things, please invest in something useful - like books or a Betty's Barbell. Thank you.

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/// BREAKING NEWS ///

Phew, glad you're still here!

This video was just sent to me from Al-Jazeera... ;)

Laetitia vespertina

by Suzanne G. on November 4th, 2004




Thank you D. for making me smile. Again and again...

The people have spoken, the bastards!

by Suzanne G. on November 4th, 2004

Sorry for my lack of clever words today.
I have a nasty election hangover and it feels like it's gonna last for the next 4 years...

Have you ever noticed that most American political conspirators were dead (sic!) sexy?!?
*hint hint*

Just take Mr Lewis Payne (a.k.a. Lewis Thornton Powell, a.k.a. Lewis Paine) for instance, who was involved in the Abraham Lincoln Assassination.
And for once even cher monsieur Roland Barthes¹ agrees with me:

"La photo est belle, le garçon aussi : c’est le studium.
Mais le punctum c’est : il va mourir.
Je lis en même temps : cela sera et cela a été ;
j’observe avec horreur un futur antérieur dont la mort est l’enjeu [...]"


Civil War Photos - click to enlarge)

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AGALMATOPHILIA SIMPLEX

"Pere Lachaise cemetery in Paris has fenced off a famous tomb to prevent lewd acts being performed on a statue.
The effigy of 19th Century journalist known as Victor Noir has long been popular with women visitors.

This is partly due to his reputation as a romantic figure, and partly because of the effigy's design.

Officials concerned about damage to the icon's groin area have erected a fence around the grave, and a sign prohibiting indecent rubbing."

(Read more over @ BBC)

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CRYPTOZOOLOGIA UNIVERSALIS

The Minnesota Association of Rogue Taxidermists feature a great taxidermy gallery on their website.
You may also want to check out some previous taxidermy links that I collected here. :)

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THE LATE FAUNA OF EARLY NORTH AMERICA

My dear conspiratrice des beaux arts, Mlle Michelle, just informed me that Mr Scott Musgrove is exhibiting his works at La Luz de Jesus Gallery in L.A. from November 5 - 29, 2004.

Thanks to Michelle, we also have some yummy new nuns in our Official Vatican Pin-Up thread. Yay!

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¹: Excerpt from the brilliant book La Chambre claire : Note sur la photographie by Roland Barthes

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EDITO

Everyone who's near Zurich or Winterthur tomorrow, please join me for a visit of the DAS AUGE UND DER APPARAT exhibition @ Fotomuseum Winterthur.
Finissage is on November 7, 2004.
See you there! :)

This Entry Is Entirely Dedicated To His Lordship Saparmurat Niyazov of Turkmenistan

by Suzanne G. on November 1st, 2004


Rabinovitch - click to enlarge)

I'm deeply sorry that I forgot to include you in my previous post, Mr Rabinovitch!
Of course I love you just as much
as Mr Szrotek...

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SQUIRREL PIN-UP DU JOUR


© Munsta @ b3ta

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BLOODY CUNTS DU JOUR

Goths For Bush

Yeah, suuure! And I'm a "Rivethead For Saparmurat Niyazov of Turkmenistan" or whut?

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HAPPY NAZI DESKTOP FOR THE WHOLE FAMILY


(click to enlarge)

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UPDATE

Phirebrush features a spanking new interview with
Mr ArtRobot Naoto Hattori.
(previously featured here)